Disclosure / Disclaimer: I received this book, free of charge, from Harmony Publishing, via Edelweiss, for review purposes on this blog. No other compensation, monetary or in kind, has been received or implied for this post. Nor was I told how to post about it
Miss Grace can be a handful, and when I saw this title for review,
I knew it was something I needed to read.
And when I realized it was from a fellow alumni,
then I definitely wanted to include it in our holiday guide!
In this fully revised and expanded second edition, Setting Limits author Robert MacKenzie is back with even more time-proven methods for dealing with misbehavior and creating positive, respectful, and rewarding relationships with children prone to acting out and disobedience.
Disruptive misbehavior, constant power struggles, manipulative or aggressive behavior--the challenges facing parents and teachers of strong-willed children can seem overwhelming at times. That's why thousands of parents and educators have turned to the solutions in Setting Limits With Your Strong-Willed Child. This revised and expanded second edition offers the most up-to-date alternatives to punishment and permissiveness--moving beyond traditional methods that wear you down and get you nowhere, and zeroing in on what really works so parents can use their energy in more efficient and productive ways. With fully updated guidelines on parenting tools like "logical consequences," and examples drawn directly from the modern world that children deal with each day, this is an invaluable resource for anyone wondering how to effectively motivate strong-willed children and instill proper conduct.
"Strong-willed children are not part of some conspiracy to make life difficult for others. They just do what strong-willed children do. They test. This is also what drives most parents crazy.The behavior makes no sense from our perspective."
And there in a nutshell is how this book will help you with YOUR strong willed child. We used to call it stubborn, but now we understand, they really need to be called strong willed. Miss Grace falls into this category 100%. She is not a very compliant child, nor is she a 'fence sitter'. She is strong in her opinions and holds to them, and tests us constantly, to see where the discipline line really is. So I knew I needed to read this book, before the pre-teen years!
What I was not expecting was how useful the book is for me NOW!
" The real problem is a bad match between the child’s temperament and the parents’ discipline methods. The parents’ tools are not well suited for the job. The predictable result—conflict and power struggles."
Well duh, we learn from our parents. If we were a compliant child, then the discipline methods we know, will NOT work with a strong-willed child. It's only common sense when you think about it! This book is SO wonderful about giving you ideas that DO work with these kids. It's not all letting them get their way either- there is discipline, but in an effective way that the child understands and will LISTEN to. Ah, I had you there. Yes, using Mackenzie's methods can really reduce the blowups and when the arguments happen, allow both of you to back up, address the real issue and be able to move on.
Mackenzie gives you plenty of actual scenarios, of typical infractions, and how to handle them. We've already had relief on fighting getting homework done, getting chores done and defusing flareups. It has been a lifesaver and I know I will keep referring to it as Miss Grace gets older. It really doesn't matter how old your strong willed child is- if you have a 3 yr old who tests you, read this book NOW and save yourself years of frustration! I also recommend it highly to give as a Christmas present to those that have Strong Willed Children!
About the Author:
Dr. Robert J. MacKenzie, Ed.D. is a Family Therapist, Educational Psychologist, and nationally recognized Parent Educator and Staff Development Trainer with more than 25 years of experience helping parents and teachers solve children's learning and behavior problems. Check out his website for more info on his programs.
Dr. MacKenzie received his M.A. in Educational Psychology from the University of California at Davis in 1977 and his Doctorate in Counseling and Educational Psychology from the University of San Francisco in 1990. In addition to providing family counseling and parent/teacher training workshops, Dr. MacKenzie writes for magazines and educational journals and consults privately with schools, hospitals, parent/teacher organizations, colleges, church groups, and wide variety of community service agencies. Dr. MacKenzie is a member of the American Psychological Association.